I made it! Through the wrath of my Saturn return. I feel it is my responsibility to share with you some of the things that would have made my experience of the past two years more like a long winter than a two-year-long avalanche (both admittedly not pleasant but one is far worse than the other).
Like those who never experience hangovers, period pains, and mood swings around the full moon, some people just won’t feel anything at all. I reserve my right to be bitter because I remind myself that growth succeeds in struggle and that being sensitive is a badass superpower. I just wish I had a proverbial heads up when it came to the point where the sturn grandfather planet came to whoop my arse into check.
By grandfather planet, I am referring to the second big boss, Saturn. The second largest planet in our solar system (Jupiter is the first). While Jupiter is a planet of blessings, optimism, success, and generosity. Saturn has beautiful rings that you can see with a telescope and is all about bringing meaning and structure to our lives. Saturn's role is to remind us of the time we have in this life to get our ambitions and responsibilities in order. It commands us to show commitment and demonstrate the discipline required if we are going to achieve our goals and fulfill our dreams.
This is the part I wish I was warned about, it doesn’t always get us there gently. Especially for us rebellious signs such as Aries, Aquarius, Libra, Sagittarius, and Taurus, we don't like being told what to do, but Saturn is five times the mass of earth and we are one tiny human so it doesn't have a single hoot to give.
So, what is a Saturn return?
Put simply, your Saturn return is when the planet Saturn returns to its position in your birth chart, this occurs every 28-30 years and takes up to two and a half years, you can check the exact dates following this link https://cafeastrology.com/saturnsigntables.html. Humans who live their life expectancy generally experience three Saturn returns throughout their life.
Our first Saturn return (the one I am finally coming to an end of), which everyone seemed to forget to mention, is all about our astrological adulthood. It brings maturity and all the things that are going to push you forward, in my case, all the things I had been avoiding.
My experience
Over the past two years, my inner world and my life have turned upside down, back to front and inside out. I mean, it couldn’t have been any more of a mind f@ck. To kick off my Saturn return, I was engaged to someone I wasn't at all sure of, then came Covid-19. When the inevitable collapse of the relationship finally happened, I did what any free-spirited jobless urban hippie would do, I went to Ibiza.
I had more fun than I can fathom and collected some magical experiences, and then, just like a sturn grandfather would, Saturn sent me home to clean up my stuff. It may have taken me nine months for me to listen (obviously) but in the end, I knew I couldn’t resist it any longer, so I returned to the UK.
Saturn's return isn't all bad
The experience of it for sure can be overwhelming especially when it comes without warning. But if we regard the perspective that everything in life happens ‘for us, not to us’, we can consider that maybe it is here to help us, to clear up some karma, to tie our loose ends, and to take responsibility for life, so we can become the human we are destined to be, with deep roots and a strong sense of purpose in this world.
When I finally gave up thinking Saturn was against me and realized it was just for my highest good and intended to push us forward in our lives it became a lot easier to accept and trust the wisdom of the grandfather.
Here's some advice for you on how to make your Saturn return easier than mine was.
Don't resist it, if you feel that your responsibilities or all the things you may have buried in the sand have gone from a whisper to a scream in your mind then listen, this is your opportunity to release anything that is weighing you down and face some of the things you might have been burying.
Consider therapy, that's right, see a therapist if necessary, I did it using (link here) and they helped me to work through my emotions, although they didn't talk about the astrological factors, it was useful to speak to a professional.
Try not to disassociate, sometimes we protect ourselves by tuning out, checking out, or withdrawing from reality until whatever it is has passed. This is not going to be helpful here now you are maturing into an astrological adult, the strength you will gain by going through and facing this stuff head-on will come in handy in the future.
Increase your self-care, long hot baths became my best friend, soothing music, Epsom salts, the whole shebang, you are worth it.
Journal, writing pen to paper is one of the best ways you can help yourself identify patterns, break cycles, and release some intense emotions.
Have an outlet that releases stagnant feelings such as boxing, or if you are on a budget punching a pillow and listening to some heavy metal or rap music works just as well, anything to get those intense emotions out.
Talk to your friends, this is a solo path but likely you have friends of a similar age so arrange groups together or a zoom call bi-weekly where you can talk about how your Saturn return is showing up, make it something you are aware of, and working with rather than working against.
Let's open a dialogue about this so we can all support each other and share our experiences. We are here for each other, through the light and the dark.